The Sushi Bandit

The other night we all concluded that the aura of our evening meal was tainted with a hostile force at work. You see this boy with the golden tresses? He was DYING of starvation and could barely keep his fingers at bay!

We were making sushi, just California rolls and Salmon rolls. We have a process, where I make the sushi rice, which is an art form of its own. Heidi prepares the fillings and Keith does the assembly or rolling. He is really good at it. I am too impatient and make a mess of the rolls, so it is His job to do the rolling. King Sushi himself would have to say he does a darned fine job. Must have been rolling all those joints in Junior high that gave him the refined skill! Prepareing enough for a large family is no small feat, and takes considerably longer than nuking a tv dinner! I also like to set out the Japanese dishes and chopsticks, make a pot of green tea and have every one sit down together to share the meal with an nice Zennish ambiance.

Yeah right! In my dreams maybe! As it was already getting late, the two teenage boys of the house kept trying to sneak peices of roll or slices of avacado. Little grubby hands kept sneaking around the corner to snatch a bit of grub. You would swear these kids are never fed! It was honestly like being swarmed by rats. Having to keep swatting them away. It got a bit dicey when the carving knife started wafting around in the air. Those of us trying to prepare the meal had an ongoing battle to keep the hungry hoards at bay. The names TROY!!! and DAVID where shouted out by my daughter and I numerous times! Some how, amidst the noisiest meal prep, I believe we have ever endured in this kitchen, we finally managed to serve up a nice bit of knosh before the boys fainted from starvation. It would be so much easier just to pick it up at Hamada next time! But the fun is in the preparation.... usually. But lately, nothing in this house is 'usual'.

Our young nephew Troy has been strenuously protesting the comdition of his wardrobe lately. All of a sudden he has decided he needs much nicer clothes than the 'rags' he currently owns. When I said to him, Troy, you are a cool guy and have lots of friends. If people wont like you because of what you wear, then they arent worth having as friends'. His response to me was "Auntie, I dont care what people think of my clothes, I know it is my problem, Its just my weakness. I just have this thing about clothes now". So after listening to him carry on about it for long enough, uncle Keith called up the local rag and got the boy a job doing a paper route. So now he will have his own money to buy himself some stylin duds.

This poor kid,,, between starving him to death and dressing him in clothes that a corpse wouldnt be caught dead in, I am amazed that he still has every girl at school drooling over him. But then, in his own words, he aknowledges "Man, I am so hot, the chicks really go for me!"

Uncle Keith..... "I think it's time that someone had THE TALK with this lad!