Friday, April 13, 2007

Red Hot


Have you ever had a vehicle that you just loved? One that you just sit in the drivers seat and you just know it's the one? It just seems to be the perfect fit. Buying a car is like shopping for shoes or jeans, it has to be comfortable but you also have to feel good in it. It has to be reliable, just as you cant have your jeans split or your shoes causing blisters, a car must fulfill certain expectations. When Keith brought me home a six year old venture, four years ago, it was love at first drive. It had been owned by a couple of seniors and had very low mileage. It was a steal. Ive driven it all over and never had any problem until this last while. Something is tormenting the electrical system. One of the standard features of a good vehicle is that it STARTS when you turn the ignition. The morning Keith left town, my four wheel baby started pouting. Ready for work I headed out to the driveway, keys in hand. When I turned the key, all I heard was this deafening "click, click, click". I have had long talks with the red hot sexy mini van on previous such occasions. It has no excuses to make for this poor performance. It has been told before. We provide it with all the comforts of motorized life, such as car washes, good gasoline, regular oil changes and over all good maintenance. In return, we expect reliability. It was clear, I would have to have words with it again.

" OK, I know I promised that I would shampoo your interior. I honestly didn't mean for that coffee with the double cream to spill all over the carpet. But is that any reason to sit idle in the drive way all week. I have to say I am very let down. We have shared so much. You have carried my children safely through the past four years. I had hopes and dreams for us. We were going to drive out to the east coast together. I wanted to be with you for many years. I am into long term commitments and frankly, you have let me down. I am forgiving though. We will give you a good working over upon the masters return. I know you probably just need a little extra attention. Perhaps you are jealous because of the new arrival? A few weeks ago the man -o-the- house bought a brand new shiny Volkswagen TDI Sport. But that is his car, it has nothing to do with me. With us. When I love, I do so unconditionally. So lucky for you, I will overlook this breech in car/driver etiquette. But if you demand big money overhauls, then I can't promise that the Lord of the Manor will be kept from sending you to the used car lot, as he has been threatening to do. That would break my heart. I have treated you like one of the family and we have spent so much time together. I implore you Little Red Van. Be good when Daddy gets home, so that you may continue to be part of our lives."

7 comments:

sharon said...

LOL Cute post. You wouldn't be the first one to coax a car into cooperating. "Come on baby, start for Mama..." LOL

Outhouse Capital of Canada said...

you are starting to sound like Deanna with your car troubles

Susan said...

Sharon,
I guess it is a god thing that the cars dont talk back to us! It might be intesting to hear what they might say!

OCC,
Deanna has no further complaints, as she now drives a brand new Mazda 5. Nice ride. We went out to Sasamat together in it a while back.

ellen said...

What a coincidence: My Cruiser wouldn't start on Thursday, but it has a brand-new battery now, so it's all better.

I have never been interested in cars, never care what I drove as long as it was reliable, until the PT CRUISER came onto the market. I fell into instant lust: I just love the funky, retro, Bonnie and Clyde look of the car. When I test-drove one, I was completely sold: It's a fun car to drive, comfortable, and easy to handle.

And it looks good on me.

Politically Homeless said...

How can the van resist that appeal?

MouthGirl.com said...

Oh how hard it is to let go of a car you love. My baby is telling me that it's time to consider replacing her and I am heartbroken.
She's as old as my son, 1997 was a good year.

Good Luck with yours
1

Monica said...

See? There's absolutely nothing wrong with my conversations with Trevor. I'm so going to start referring people to your post if they keep telling me it's strange to talk to my mustang.